"Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly,
while bad people will find a way around the laws."
- Plato (427-347 B.C.)

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant,
have a little wine, some good food and companionship.
She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

We also sleep in separate beds.
Hers is in Sydney and mine is in Melbourne.

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary.
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
So I suggested the kitchen.

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker
Then she said, "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!".
So I bought her an electric chair.

Remember.... Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
Statistically, 100% of all divorces started with marriage.

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.

The last fight was my fault.
My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"....
I said, "Dust!"

In the beginning, God created earth and rested.
Then God created man and rested.
Then God created woman.
Since then, neither God nor man has rested.

Why do husbands die before their wives?
'Cause they want to'.

Lots of new pages added at https://epremal.tripod.com/.

One day many years ago at a school in South London a teacher said to the class of 5-year-olds,
"I'll give £20 to the child who can tell me who was the most famous man who ever lived."

An Irish boy put his hand up and said, "It was St. Patrick."
The teacher said, "Sorry Paddy, that's not correct."

Then a Scottish boy put his hand up and said, "It was St. Andrew."
The teacher replied, "I'm sorry, Hamish, that's not right either.

Finally, a Gujarati boy raised his hand and said, "It was Jesus Christ."
The teacher said, "That's absolutely right, Jayant, come up here and I'll give you the £20."

As the teacher was giving Jayant his money, she said,
"You know Jayant, since you're Gujarati, I was very surprised you said Jesus Christ."
Jayant replied, "Yes, in my heart I knew it was Lord Krishna, but business is business!"

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An Indian snake charmer holds the head of a poisonous snake in his mouth during a demonstration during the Hindu festival of Nag Panchami in the village of Khadiatola, 90 km(56 miles) north of the eastern Indian city of Calcutta, August 17, 2002. About 50,000 devotees attended the festival to worship the snake goddess. The snake is one of the most revered animals by Hindus. REUTERS/Jayanta Shaw

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13-year-old spider hunter Toen Tim displays two live tarantula's after catching them 70 km (43 miles) east of Phnom Penh August 25, 2002. Spiders, which were first eaten by desperate refugees under the Khmer Rouge in the late 1970's, have since become a national delicacy. Picture taken August 25, 2002. REUTERS/Chor Sokunthea

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Porn film actresses( L-R,) Clara Morgan, Chrystelle Lawrence, Tara Patrick, and Estelle des Anges, pose for photographers ahead of the Hot d'Or adult film awards in Cannes, France May 15, 2001. With television now showing 950 X-rated and violent films a month, two-thirds of the French say they want pornography banned from broadcast and cable channels according to a poll by the audiovisual watchdog CSA published in Le Parisien September 6, 2002. (Eric Gaillard/Reuters)