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ePremal Newsletter
Vol. 7 Number 1
https://epremal.tripod.com/

In this issue :
Quote
Forward - India's integrity in diversity
Joke - Hard at Work
Recently In News

 

Dear Friends

I am back.

Its been a gap of about 3 years since my last mail. But you all have been visiting ePremal in big numbers & still my old issues are read & forwarded with same enthusiasm that I had to re-start this on popular demand.

As of now, the list is at 'nano' level but I have just shifted to this new platform & its a matter of time that it comes back to its old glory. And a special Thanks to you all the early birds.

Nothing much to drop right-now, bye, take care & happy reading.
Premal Hathiwala

Quote

"If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange these apples then you and I will still each have one apple.
But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas."
--George Bernard Shaw

Top
Forward : India's integrity in diversity

Bengali
One Bengali = poet.
Two Bengalis = a film society.
Three Bengalis = political party.
Four Bengalis = two political parties.
More than four Bengali's = Countrywide agitation to bring Ganguli into Team.

Bihari
One Bihari = Laloo Prasad Yadav.
Two Biharis = booth-capturing squad.
Three Biharis = caste killing.
Four Biharis = entire literate population of Patna.

Mallu
One Mallu = coconut stall.
Two Mallus = a boat race.
Three Mallus = Gulf job racket.
Four Mallus = oil slick.

UP Bhaiyya
One UP bhaiyya = a milkman.
Two UP bhaiyyas = halwai shop.
Three UP bhaiyyas = a fist-fight in the UP assembly.
Four UP bhaiyyas = mosque-destruction squad.

Gujju
One Gujju = share-broker in a Bombaytrain.
Two Gujjus = rummy game in a Bombaytrain.
Three Gujjus = Bombay's noisiest restaurant.
Four Gujjus = stock market scam.

Andhraite
One Andhraite = chili farmer.
Two Andhraites = software company in New Jersey.
Three Andhraites = Naxalite outfit.
Four Andhraites = song-and-dance number in a Telugu movie.

Kashmiri
One Kashmiri = carpet salesman.
Two Kashmiris = carpet factory.
Three Kashmiris = terrorist outfit.
Four Kashmiris = shoot-at-sight order.

Tamil-Brahmin
One Tam-Brahm = priest at the Vardarajaperumal temple.
Two Tam-Brahms = Maths tuition class.
Three Tam-Brahms = Queue outside the U.S consulate at 4 a.m.
Four Tam-Brahms = Thyagaraja music festival in Santa Clara.

Mumbaikar
One Mumbaikar = footpath vada-pav stall.
Two Mumbaikars = film studio.
Three Mumbaikars = slum.
Four Mumbaikars = The number of people standing on your foot in the train at rush hour.

Sindhi
One Sindhi = currency racket.
Two Sindhis = papad factory.
Three Sindhis = duplicate goods shop in Ulhasnagar.
Four Sindhis = Hong Kong Retail Traders Association.

Marwari
One Marwari = The neighbourhood foodstuff adulterator.
Two Marwaris = 50% of Calcutta.
Three Marwaris = Finish off all Gujaratis & Sindhis.
Four Marwaris = Threaten the Jews as a community.

Haryanvi.
One Haryanavi = tube light.
Two Haryanavi = agriculture.
Three Haryannavi= Lathi squad.
Four Haryanavi = actually just one was enough.

Top - More forwards
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Joke : Hard at Work

Bob works hard at the plant and spends two nights each week bowling and plays golf every Saturday. His wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.

The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Bob! How ya doin?"
His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh no," says Bob. "He's on my bowling team."

When they are seated, a waitress asks Bob if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser.
His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, "How did she know that you drink Budweiser?"
"I recognize her, she's the waitress from the golf club. I always have a Bud at the end of the 1st nine, honey."

A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Bob, starts to rub herself all over him and says, "Hi Bobby. Want your usual table dance, big boy?"

Bob's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.

Bob follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.

Bob tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it. She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every 4 letter word in the book.

The cabby turns around and says, "Geez Bob, you picked up a real bitch this time.

Top
Recently In News
(Courtesy : Reuters, Associated Press & Yahoo! News)
If the image doesn't open, click here.
Photo

Residents check the damage caused by Cyclone Gonu, in Muscat June 7, 2007. At least 12 people have been confirmed killed in Oman by Cyclone Gonu, which swept the coastline of the Gulf country this week, a relief official said on Thursday. REUTERS/Randolph Caguintuan (OMAN)


If the image doesn't open, click here.
Photo

Chilean born artist Marco Evaristti painted an iceberg red to produce a sculpture titled, 'The Ice Cube Project' in 2004 in Ilulissat Fiord, Greenland. French police on Tuesday arrested Evaristti, who planned to paint the peak of Mont Blanc red in a bid to raise awareness of environmental issues.(AFP/SCANPIX/File/Lars Nyboll)


If the image doesn't open, click here.
Photo

Riyo Mori, Miss Universe 2007, poses for photographers in Mexico City, Tuesday, May 29, 2007, after winning the beauty contest Monday. (AP Photo/Eduardo Verdugo)


If the image doesn't open, click here.
Photo

Naked cyclists ride their bikes through downtown Vancouver, British Columbia during the World Naked Bike Ride Day June 9, 2007. About 50 cyclists rode through the streets trying to bring attention to pollution caused by cars. REUTERS/Andy Clark (CANADA)


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